I am a money avoider.

I am a money avoider. 

The whole reason I started this coaching business to empower women to make money on their own terms was that I was a money avoider. 

It is vulnerable to share that.

But I was and still am… (Everything is energy. Nothing goes away, it gets integrated and transmutes into another form of energy.)

Many of you know my story… 

Picture it… Queens, NYC 1993… 

Deciding what to major in in school. 

Tried marketing, tried economics, tried philosophy… settled in on finance. International finance with accounting as a minor. 

Business school was where I was headed so I could get a big job in the financial center of the world. NYC.

And that I did. 

Climbed the corporate world ladder eventually securing that corner office on the 26th floor overlooking Central Park with the fancy corporate title and salary to match. 2003 

Fast forward several years, 2010… I have moved to Colorado, and after several years of thriving, I am without a job, on unemployment, with an eviction notice on my door. 

Ashamed. To say the least. 

Embarrassed. YEP.

Not sure who to turn to ask for help. 

Who I could trust?

How to find my faith that everything would be alright? ‘Cause I sure wasn’t feeling it. 

I am supposed to be the Money Expert. I should know how to fix this. 

But I didn’t.

I was avoiding my money. And it left me here, exposed, unsafe, and almost homeless. 

And in that… 

I lost all faith in how to move forward. 

What was the point?

But the day came… one courageous day… something moved in me to come back to myself, and find my power, as little as I thought it was, and I did what any Gen-Xer would do at that time to find out the next step how to do something. 

I Googled it. 

I Googled “how to get my faith back.”

Not much meaningful stuff came up. 

But what came to light and eventually pulled me out of my money mess was that I willing to be vulnerable with myself and my relationship with money and stop avoiding it and treat it as a relationship I wanted to improve. 

And in knowing human relationships & how to improve them, is to communicate, and reach out. 

So that started basically the first exercise I give all my clients. Write a letter to Money, as if it was a person in your life. 

So my invitation to you this week, if you are having “relationship problems” with money and you want to improve this relationship is to reach out and have a chat. 

You can write a letter to money. Lay it all out on the table. This is for your eyes only. 

And if you wish to take it a step further, after you wrote your letter to money, switch roles and write yourself back as money back to you. 

What is the dialogue that has emerged? What gremlins showed up, or assumptions came to light? 

Very potent…. 

We all have a part of us that wants to avoid it so we don’t get hurt, feel unsafe, or have to feel uncomfortable feelings. It’s OK. 

However, true safety comes from being whole.

And your relationship with money can be a powerful conduit to that wholeness.